Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Linda: Homeward Bound - My 13

Homeward Bound


5 months. Our homeward journey begins in less than 24 hours, and I pause, in closure. Closure? The days here have come to a close, but the lessons learned, the insights, the kindness and love received and given, these will reverberate. When one is blessed with a journey such as this, one which is not just an “architectural tour”, but where one has had glimpses into the hearts, minds, and souls of a people and yourself, there are two reactions when returning. The first is to file it away, like photos in a photo album that one seldom opens, happy memories whose details blur and fade with time. The second, harder way is to assimilate those pictures and those stories, the people and the ideas. I return, happily, to my world rich in family, friends, work, and the beautiful forests, streams, and wildlife that surround our homes. I return home to happy sounds and loving arms. Yet, I must take what I have seen and learned and bring it home, too. And if one learns to take what is in one’s mind and put it in one’s heart and in one’s actions, then those truths and insights will not only be lost, but will grow and expand, reaching into new waters like a stone thrown into a lake.

In my interviews with the Rinpoches whose lectures I attended (a Rinpoche is an incarnation of a previous lama), both immediately gave advice about how to hold onto the special things that life brings you. Chamtrul Lobsang Gyatso Rinpoche (whom I hope will come to Bloomington) was the most detailed. He said, “During the teaching time, one finds a special essence, a taste in your heart. Do not lose that and don’t forget it. With vigilance, remember again and again what the key points are. Remember what is easiest to understand. You will not be able to remember everything, but you can remember what was special. Remember. Again and again. Once a week. Once a month. Check on yourself, sit, and remember. This will help you to develop. If you do not check and take time to remember, you will have a positive imprint, but it might not be strong enough to help you develop and it can disappear. If you remember, you will increase your understanding and will develop spiritually.”

The key points to the teachings are many, though I will write one little story. I was walking down the mountain one morning, on the way to a lecture in the town below. We had a tremendous storm the night before, and the streets were not only wet, but, in some places, covered in a layer of slippery clay. As I walked, I saw a woman walking with a large jar of water on her head. Her eyes were downcast and she was totally concentrated on the task of walking without falling or spilling her precious water. And I thought, “I need to pray like that, with that single-mindedness. And … I can do that here, and now.” It’s those kinds of lessons that are the most precious.

And what will I take home from all the other lessons of this amazing country? (This is a definitely stream of consciousness.)

The cows here are quite different, and look at you with a knowing eye.
One can live very well on three sets of clothing.
A warm bucket bath is better than a cold shower.
Though I loved every part of India for different reasons, my heart is in the foothills of the
Himalayas.
I love traveling with my daughter. Mothers, if you ever have a chance to travel
with your daughter – do it. Fathers, if you ever have a chance to travel
with your son – do it. I loved traveling with the whole family, too.
Someday, I hope to travel with my son. (My husband is, thankfully, a given.)
I was quite jealous of reading about a nun who spent 12 years in a cave.
There are wonderful, wonderful people everywhere – ordinary people, educated people,
enlightened people. You just have to look, for they are open-hearted and generous.
If you look, you will find them.
You find what you are looking for – so be careful what you are looking for. You can
waste a lot of time doing things that, in fact, don’t make you truly happy
and “alive”.
It is amazing what people can carry on their heads.
It is amazing how many people can fit on a motorcycle.
One can see your loved ones in perfect strangers, and feel comforted by that.
It’s really good to have someone watching your back, seeing the subtleties of a
situation when you are busy bargaining or arranging. Eleanor is
quite good at this (though when she is with me, she has a surprisingly
bad sense of direction).
Knowing martial arts is an enormous help – not that we needed it directly. It gives you
a “presence” that helped. But you still have to aware!
In coming back to Chennai, I really realized how comfortable I am in India and how much I’ve become a part of her.
I no longer look at the jumble of streets, shops, buying, selling, begging, etc. with
a little trepidation, but have come, somehow, to embrace it all.
That there is incredible poverty, need, suffering, disease. And yet, the amount
of suffering one feels is determined by one’s attitude. We have the key
to happiness, no matter what our condition – which is not to underestimate
the difficulty of the situation and that sometimes there is no way out of
that situation.
I love how people here aren’t afraid to show who they are and what they think. They
show it with the clothes they wear, the jewelry, the way they walk, and the way
they talk. Instead of hiding behind a politeness, they are open – and therefore
incredibly accepting.
There are a lot of dogs in India … and very few cats.
If you ever have a chance to get blessed by an elephant – DO IT!
I loved how people in McLeod Ganj could leave the jewelry and art work on their
street stands and nothing gets stolen.
I have truly learned to live in the present, with no expectations and very few needs (a
room, food, and one set of clothing – though 3 is nice). Though I am happy to be
going home, I am also happy to be here. And this, this is one of the things I most hope
to hold onto when I return home.
When you are truly content, everyone you meet is happy, too. The happiness just spreads
and spreads.
That the more you love, the more love you have to give. It is really quite amazing.
Sometimes one holds onto love as though you have to save it for the important
people in your life and that it could run out. But the truth is, the more you give, the
more you have. Especially when the giving is without ambition, pride, or self-
gratification. Here, it is easy because I don’t know anyone. It is easy to give to
everyone impartially. Now, I get to practice this at home.
It is utterly amazing what one person with a big heart, a wise idea, and a strong will
can accomplish – for generations and generations to come.
Art is essential – true art, that is free from the ego and expresses the greatness of
a people’s heart, mind, and soul, which is, if you trace its roots back, inevitably
linked to the divine.
I love small towns, and, I really don’t like shopping. Even here! Though, the fun of
shopping and getting to know people, coupled with the stupendously
beautiful things, and the excellent prices has overcome even my usual
antipathy to shopping.
I definitely think the drivers here are some of the bravest and craziest people in the
world.
I don’t really bargain very well.
I have a hard time being “posh” – but no one seems to mind.
I can easily be a vegetarian when the food is as good and varied as it is here.
Yes, it is dirty, but one can be healthy in India – very healthy.
One can never think that an opportunity given today will be there tomorrow.
One does not need to gather “experiences”. Rather, choose what is important
and go deeply.
Faces. So many beautiful faces and warm hearts. Strings and strings of people to pray
for, to love, to honor, to cherish. People who have given on themselves and
made me a better person.
I can look at the same scene from nature, especially in the mountains, day after day,
and never be bored.
A month of a simple life of going to 2 lectures, eating, and sleeping seems like a week.
Though part of me would love to be the hermit on the hill, I am living exactly where I
need to live and doing exactly what I need to do. I have the best possible life,
and I am prostrate with gratitude.
It is up to me to make this life matter – for myself and for others.
Be alive. Live each moment to the brim, which does not mean filling it with adventures,
sensual pleasures, and distractions. It means walking down a street, any street,
and noticing the beauty of a flower, the warmth of the sun, the hunger in your
stomach and the knowledge that there is food in the fridge. It means seeing
a person who is sad or self absorbed and wishing them well. It means
smiling, especially at key moments.
Ask the most important questions. Why am I here? What does it mean to be a
human? How can one truly live a life filled with wisdom, pure intent, perfect
speech, wholesome thoughts? How can I be better tomorrow than I am today?
Remember. Remember. Remember. Remember what was given, what you gave you
that special essence, that taste in your heart. For no one can take that away … except you.
5 months was not too long!!! It was perfect, for many of the lessons came after several months – right up to the last week. And it feels “right” to be coming home.
Finally, it is not what you see, but the essence of what it means and of the hearts of the
people it manifests.

The highlights?
Sitting on the top of Mount Arunachula, a thick layer of clouds below cover the
world and the sky is open above. Floating, and realizing how one can
love deeply and well, even when one is far away.
The Temple in Chidambaram.
Tiger tracks!
The concert in the jungle of Kerala.
Meeting Sarath’s family of doctors.
Being with 1000’s of monks and nuns in Bodhgaya.
Watching our bags bounce down the “streets” in Varanasi.
St. Thom’s Cathedral.
The Mediterranean streets of Cochin.
Violin concert in Cochin.
The face of the Jagadguru
Ananda Mai Ma’s ashram
Fatepur Sikr
Camel safari!!
Jaisalmar
Aleppy boats
The sites around Aurengabad
Studying and living at VKV
Hampi.
The Taj Mahal.
Khajuraho.
Tibetan food
Tibetan faces
Rinpoche, monks, nuns, lectures, and snow clad peaks – at every glance.
That, truly, there is no place like home – though some places run a close
second, especially for short periods of time.
It’s time to go home. The journey got better and better, deeper and deeper, and
now it is complete. It is right to go now. It is good. And though I have
been very “soft” here in the Himalayas, where the beauty of a sound or a
face or a scene can pierce me to tears (regularly – happy tears, lovely
tears), I am not crying now, even though I must leave.
I hope I can come back. I would start here in the Himalayas and go north. And yet, if it is not in my destiny to do so, that is all right. For we did this well.

Sunday, May 3, 2009

Shri Ram Ashram

I spent about a week at the Shri Ram Ashram/orphanage, and I loved it. I loved it so much, in fact, that I stayed longer than planned even though Mom moved on without me. She needed to get away from people and busyness, and just hike in the mountains and listen to lectures. I can understand that, but I was having such a fantastic time that I just wasn’t ready to leave.
There are 66 kids at Shri Ram, I think. And they all seem so happy. Of course, when you have 66 brothers and sisters, there’s bound to be some drama and discontent – for example, the game ‘sequence’ is quite popular, but only 2 or 3 people can play at one time, causing some difficulties – but for the most part, things run smoothly and everyone takes care of each other. Life here has actually reminded me a bit of my own childhood, of my group of friends who I became so close that they became, essentially, my ‘brothers and sisters’, of my own ‘didis’ and ‘bhais’ (adopted aunties and uncles) and of the general happiness of those precious, golden years.
My day took on a bit of a routine. I’d join the older boys for their CrossFit workout every morning. Rashmi, the director, started the program to get in shape and convinced the boys to join her by letting them out of Yoga. It is really a great program and the camaraderie between the boys and Rashmi is fantastic – it has really brought them together. It’s great fun to see the boys teasing Rashmi and encouraging each other. And I was accepted into their group very graciously. These boys are currently either taking their final exams and have been released from school to study or are waiting for their exams to be returned. This means that they are hanging around the ashram all day instead of being in school, so it’s easy and fun to hang out with them.
Also, the preschoolers are still here during school hours, so I can play with them. It brings back lots of nostalgic baby-sitting stories and I wish I could introduce my young friends from opposite sides of the world to each other. The youngest Shri Ram kid is only a few months old. She was found abandoned in a field and brought to the ashram, where she was named Sita, after the wife of Rama who was similarly found in a field when she was a baby. She is adorable, if underweight, but it seems her luck is looking up. In a sense, she is better off at this orphanage, with all its love and care, than growing up in a family that doesn’t want her and can’t support her. That’s the sad truth.
Everyone comes home at one o’clock for lunch and then studies in their rooms. The best part of the day is at 5: Recess!! A huge bunch of kids get together to play basketball. I’ve actually gotten a bunch of blisters on my feet from playing barefoot, but that’s not going to stop me. Rashmi engineered a boys vs. girls game, which was lots of fun. The boys won. By a lot. Really a lot. Our cheating didn’t help. We had 10 girls against 5 boys, but the boys are all about a head taller than the girls. (To illustrate this point, let me tell you – I was one of the tallest player on the girls team…and I’m 5’2”) So the boys just shoot from far away and then some other boy will keep bouncing up and getting the rebound shot until it goes in. Not that it usually took that long; Gautham is particularly good at the long distance shots. So the final score was 35 baskets to 1. (Baskets, not points!) It was quite discouraging, but we arranged for a rematch…and lost that as well. Finally, on the third day, we switched up the teams. It was much more even, but more difficult to remember who to pass to. I had lots of fun. I didn’t even really mind losing. Usually I’m really competitive (and I did play a bit rough, which shocked some of the boys a bit) but I had such a good time that it didn’t matter.
Mom and I also gave a Tae Kwon Do demonstration, which was fun. As always when teaching kids, or anybody really, we stressed the importance of not misusing the training. We kept the demo pretty simple actually; focusing on what’s actually useful, rather than what’s flashy and exciting. Moving properly, for example, was a key point. People who don’t train never really think that footwork can win or lose a fight. And after Mom had left, I gave a Martial Arts class in place of the CrossFit Kids session. (Every fourth day in Crossfit is a rest day, so the boys train the younger kids. I took this over for one session.) I taught the basic boxing Jab-cross-hook combination and showed them how to do rolls and back-falls. The rolls were a special request of Rashmi’s, so that they could roll if they fall down playing field hockey, but I’m not sure how much of an effect I had. A few kids got it, but I’m always surprised at how difficult it is for some people. Even when I started training, I’d been doing summersaults on the living room floor for years and it was merely a matter of modifying and improving what was already there. But these kids had never tried this, so we had to start from square one. It also didn’t help that all we had was a few yoga mats stacked up – not exactly the softest surface. The kids were quite surprised when I invited some of them to punch my hand so they could feel how to do it wrong and then how to do it right after I corrected them. They were quite tentative, even when I told them to hit it harder. I’m used to having my hands punched because I often just hold my hand out rather than going to find a pad when I’m teaching at home, but I’m pretty sure some people were quite sure I had lost my sanity. (Radha was especially convinced of this.) It was enjoyable though, and I had a few kids coming up to proudly demonstrate their punches for the remaining days. The best moment was when I told them to do their age in push-ups during the warm up. This is great in kids Tae Kwon Do classes, because the older kids have to do more. Unfortunately, I didn’t realize Rashmi had joined in. “My age in push-ups?” she asked. “My age?! Is this fair?” The kids thought the situation was absolutely hilarious.
The night before I left, I got to go to a wedding. You have no idea how excited I was! I spent at least half an hour picking out an outfit. There’s a trunk of donated clothing in the guest dorm that visitors have just left. Some of the stuff is really nice. After going through several options, I decided upon a lovely apricot Salwar Kamees. I am not usually a pink sort of person, but the color actually quite lovely, and the suit fit as though it had been tailored for me. By some chance, I even had earrings that matched perfectly. I wasn’t really paying attention to the time because I thought everyone was going and most of the children were eating. But as it turned out, only the older kids were invited, because it was their teacher getting married. (I only lucked out and got an invitation because Rashmi was looking out for me.) So when Barbara, another guest, yelled at me from her window that I should be getting ready, I was taken totally by surprise. I hurridly ended my conversation with Vijay and ran off to get dressed. Years of changing for martial arts classes payed off and I arrived back downstairs within 10 minutes, suit on, light make-up, hair brushed (sort of). But of course, we were operating on India time, so after all my hustling and bustling I just had to calm down and wait. Some of the girls redid my hair, and fixed my make-up, which was apparently too understated when I did it. We had to borrow lipstick from Andrea. And still we weren’t ready to go.
Finally everybody boarded the school-bus and we were off. But of course, even though we left late, we were still some of the first people to arrive. I wandered around for three hours with my new-found friends before the groom arrived. We wandered around, ate some of the food, talked and walked. It was fun. Rashmi said, when she us walking around, that I really looked Indian. I think it was partly my escorts and my clothes, but she was not the only one. An unknown woman bumped into me and looked absolutely shocked when I apologized in English, and with an American accent.
Unfortunately, we had to leave before the bride arrived because it was late and it was a school night. (Indian schools do not have Saturdays free) I was sorry to go so early but realized that the usual bedtime was 8 or 9, not 11.
My final day was bittersweet to say the least. I was looking forward to seeing the Himalayas, as I have been since the beginning of the trips, but there were so many sad goodbyes – more than almost any other place. Only VKV is comparable and I stayed there a month, not 6 days. Shri Ram is yet another place I will have to return to when I can afford to come back. In fact, it was upon leaving here that I realized that a piece of my heart has truly been left behind and I have finally decided concretely to return. I may even become an India Junkie and return time after time. However, that’s all in the future. The present, too, is wonderful.

From Princess to Pauper

I have gone from Princess to Pauper in 24 short hours. We left the lap of luxury around noon and took a pre-ordered rickshaw to the bus stand. Rickshaws do not generally frequent the Lake Palace Jetty and, I have to say, ours looked distinctly out of place amongst the classic cars. The bus ride from Udaipur to Ajmer was just your run-of-the-mill bus rude. Mom and I have really gotten used to traveling via bus. You just have to stare out the window for hours and accept time is passing, slowly, even though it doesn’t seem like it. I have found my iPod to be a huge comfort.
Unfortunately, the bus ride was not the end of the journey. We were actually headed for Pushkar, not Ajmer. We got a rickshaw. Unfortunately, a tout jumped in as well before we could leave. We didn’t make a big deal about it; usually you just listen to what they have to say, then tell them you already have hotel/restaurant arrangements and they go away. So we didn’t make a big hue and cry about it, just ignored him for the most part. But halfway up the first hill he turned around and said that one of our bags was gone. Sure enough, my suitcase was no longer sitting next to Mom’s in the back of the rickshaw. Mom and I both suspect foul play; we agree that it is very likely that the tout pushed it. There were several indicators. First of all, I just didn’t like the feel of him – he felt a bit slimy. I know that this is hardly evidence, but gut instincts should sometimes be followed and if Mom and I had been more awake, and hadn’t been feeling a bit sick, we would probably have had our guards up. He also, however, noticed the tag on the suitcase that said Lake Palace and commented on it. And when we were looking for it he asked if I had any jewelry in it. The rickshaw driver also seemed a bit more nervous than absolutely necessary and kept asking Mom to give up when she was walking along the road looking for tracks.
At one point while Mom was walking a group of young men surrounded the rickshaw and began asking questions rather aggressively. They seemed to be the local gang. Then they hopped into the rickshaw also, to “help”, but got out after a just a little while. They seemed a bit too familiar with the tout. I was really wishing I was more fluent in Hindi at this point because all I could catch was “one bag” and random verbs.
We did report the loss at the police station, but the officer didn’t seem particularly hopeful, although he said they would look. Mom didn’t say anything about the tout because he accompanied her into the station. Of course, I could be wrong. It seems likely that it was stolen because we didn’t find it. But it wasn’t necessarily planned. Some impoverished person could have found a deserted suitcase by the side of the road and seen little wrong with using somebody else’s misfortune to feed and clothe their family. I hope that this was the case and that it really does benefit someone who needs it.
Luckily, nothing valuable was in the suitcase so this is an inconvenience and a nuisance more than a real problem. All my money was on my money belt under my clothes and my iPod and camera were in my backpack which serves as a purse when traveling. And Mom had my passport. Thank goodness. Also in my backpack were all my allergy/asthma medicines, my journal with all my friends’ contact information and my random doodles and notes, and my toiletries bag. So I’m not that badly off, really. One of the great things about saris is that they are “one size fits all”, so I can borrow Mom’s.
I did lose a few things that I will miss, though. I really liked my beautifully embroidered camel-hide shoes, my new bedspread, the wooden Om I’d carved for my brother at VKV, some knives (one was a real Damascus blade with a horse-head pommel and silver inlay – a perfect Eleanor weapon) and the mortar and pestle Sarath gave me. That is entirely due to sentimental value; he’d given it to me to prepare a particular medicine but when I finished that medicine, he said I should keep it just in case I needed a mortar and pestle while traveling in India. Whenever I rearranged my suitcase and saw it, I would burst out laughing and happily remember all those hours at the hospital in good company. The terrible thing about belongings with sentimental value is that they can’t really be replaced. I was also somewhat miffed to lose my hiking boots. Honestly! I had lugged those silly boots around India so I could go hiking in the Himalayas. (And let me tell you, they take up lots of space and are not light.) And one week before I finally get to use them, they are gone. Ah well, life happens and then we move on.
So that’s how it happened; how Eleanor went from the Good Life to having next to nothing. I guess I got what I deserved for wishing for adventures.

Saturday, May 2, 2009

Linda: Motivational Lecture, Saturday AM, May 2

Motivational Lecture, Saturday AM, May 2

Verse 9: Developing bodhicitta will eliminate all negativities and will develop the basis for all positive qualities. The moment you develop bodhicitta, you acquire a meaningful name and you become a valuable human being.

Should bodhicitta come to birth
In one who suffers in the dungeons of samsara,
In that instant he is called the buddhas’ heir,
Worhshipful alike to gods and men.

The moment one conceives of bodhicitta, whether it is inspired of acquired, that moment is truly, truly important. Line 2: we are oppressed as we are in cyclic existence. We are bound here by our surrounding conditions and by our disturbing attitudes and emotions. Our compulsive actions, caused mainly by our disturbing emotions, are like chains which fetter us. In the instant we get bodhicitta, you are the heir to the Victorious Ones, the ones that have gone to bliss, and that person becomes a fitting object for reverence and homage and praise. One is entitled to a title and is truly meaningful. You are deserving of homage the moment you develop the highest form of bodhicitta – not realization or what you will overcome or gain later, but even a beginner bodhisattva ( a real one). As a beginning bodhisattva, you are still suffering, you are still changing and developing and you cannot help others in a significant way, but the bodhicitta is constantly present, it is second nature. The moment bodhicitta is second nature to you, is spontaneous and constant, at that moment you are a bodhisattva.

What is meant when bodhicitta arises in one? Not a kindhearted flash, but when it it really trained to be self extinguished, to have affection for all and to have aroused, again and again, the compassion to stop suffering and the love to increase happiness, and to take the responsibility to decrease suffering and increase happiness, and you wish and ask, over and over, to be enlightened for the sake of others – eventually this becomes spontaneous. It will no longer be an effort. When it is constantly present, you are a bodhisattva “born in us”.

We have a mind. Can our mind stretch to encompass more and more human beings. Sangay is bodhicitta and means mind expansion. Are we working to be expanded? And, when one does this with an all encompassing intelligence, one understands all human possibilities. Then this new bodhisattva has limitless good qualities and their virtue is vast. This kind of bodhisattva is exceptional in the world.

Thus, the text delineates the benefits of this spiritual path. The more you appreciate the benefits, the more you can be interested. The next verses give six analogies to aid in our understanding. Verse 10:

For like the supreme substance of the alchemists,
It takes the impure from of human flesh
And makes of it the priceless body of a Buddha.
Such is bodhicitta: we should grasp it firmly!

Just like a tiny amount of an elixir of mercury, when combined with other ingredients, has the capacity to transmute base iron into a large amount of gold, so can bodhicitta cleanse our bodies of all its impurities from birth, from unclean foods, from its unclean substances through giving us the capacity of accruing merit, and transmute this body into a buddhabody which can accomplish all that is desired and overcome all that is problematic. Since you gain such priceless qualities, then make an effort to arouse bodhicitta in you and then hold on firmly. Do you believe that? Even with this very body, we can do it now. And if you enter the Vajra Vehicle with the right intention and on the correct basis, one can attain enlightenment in this short lifetime. How? 1. iinsure long life through practices of crea and yoga tantra. 2. engage in the highest yogic tantra. 3. do it with the correct motivation. This leads to enlightenemtn and this body can become the body of the Victorious One. This is the power of the elixir of bodhicitta.

There is no short route. One has to go through the path of accumulation (of merit?), then the 4 phases of the path of preparation. Then, in just one session of perfect meditative equipoise, one achieves the state of exalted or aria being. And from this status, one becomes an Ultimate bodhisattva which sees reality. But the underpinning of all this is the desire to help others. Thus, one has a mental body that is not the result of actions by disturbing emotions or the imprints of ignorance.

The initial of the 10 bodhisattva stages is a purified body, due to the elixir quality of bodhicitta, but there are still imprints as a result of ignorance. Bodhicitta will then overcome the 84,000 disturbing emotions and give one the brilliance of wisdom that will shine forth. This transmutation is rare and priceless.

Verse 11: the second analogy

If the perfect ship’s captain of all migrant beings
Have with boundless wisdom seen its priceless worth,
We who wish to leave our nomad wandering
Should hold well to this precious bodhicitta.

Bodhicitta is like a monarch’s most precious and rare jewel. With it, one gets rid of the cuase of all misfortune and gains everlasting happiness. It is rare and difficult to find, so make an effort to find it, and once found, hold onto it. The ship’s captain is the fully Enlightened One. They are skilled, experienced, unbiased, and utterly benevolent to all on board. They know the value of this jewel and they have the path and the means to get it. Their ship is filled with merchants who also know the value of these jewels, and the captain takes them all to this Treasure Island. When one gets to this island and finds a precious jewel, you will want to hold onto it with all your might. We have the capacity to find this jewel, and when you find it, to not let go.

***

This is the last lecture I will post on the blog site. I think one has a good idea of how the lectures will proceed and you are either interested or stopped reading these long ago! There are 5 more days of lecture and we will probably only get through the next 10 verses, out of 36, of the first part of the book. I will continue to take notes, as this, for me, is the best means of paying attention in class. Like the metaphysical/alchemical lectures, I will be happy to share those with others upon our return – which is very soon.

Next week, (our final week!), the metaphysical lectures (as I call them) will be on Emptiness and Compassion. If they are as deeply intellectual as these last, I will not post them. These lectures are, in fact, rather difficult to put in notes. But the notes I have, I will share with those who are interested.

The series of metaphysical lectures on the Vajrasattva Mediation (purification) ended on Friday. They were immensely inspiring, with beautiful and detailed visualizations and understandings that painted a glorious path. Each moment, a new vision arose – splendid, powerful, pure. And I would think, ah, this is it. There can be no more. And that vision kept going on and on and on until all that was left was the plentitude of the Non-Referential Emptiness. It was relentless and riveting and of immense grandeur and beatitude. And this was just a common lecture about the meditation. But such was the quality of the lecture and the quality of the teacher, that this path was laid in front, clear and unwavering, straight and shimmering, revealed as key points, right to the glorious goal.

How is it that one, such as I, came to hear and see truths such as these? Only from that source of Pure Compassion and Pure Mercy. A confirmation in a different modality, set in the light of a crystalline vision. And the thread that has wrapped itself around this entire journey is that you find what you seek. “Ask and you shall receive.” And with this thought comes the fear and care in knowing exactly what you are truly asking for and the motivation behind it, and the certitude that with that cause, the effect will surely come. Purity and Vigilance. Patience and Trust. Discernment and Union. It’s all there.

Linda: Motivational Lecture, Friday AM, May 1

Motivational Lecture, Friday AM, May 1

Review of Verse 5 in The Way of the Bodhisattava by Shantidevi

As when a flash of lightning rends the night,
And in its glare shows all that the dark black clouds hid,
Likewise rarely, through the buddhas’ power,
Virtuous thoughts rise, brief and transient, in the world.

We are all beginners, so the with to really engage in a spiritual practice only comes up rarely AND to have an ardent wish to practice the Mahayana is even more rare AND to be detached from one’s own personal happiness and be concerned for others’ suffering is extremely rare. So, when one does have these thoughts, it is very important to try and strengthen them and have them become more frequent.

To practice bodhicitta (the spirit of enlightenment), one needs a good body, but the main thing is the belief and admiration of spiritual teachings, in this case of Buddhist teaching and in particular the teachings of the Great Vehicle. Interest and Belief are the essential starting point and this is the Mental Basis for a spiritual aspiration. We will not develop it if we are not interested or if we do not believe in it.

The next part of this text is written to inspire us to practice by describing the wonderful benefits of following a spiritual path. Verse 6 describes the power of bodhicitta to counteract the wrongdoing of body, speech, and mind.

Thus behold the utter frailty of goodness!
Except for perfect bodhicitta,
There is nothing able to withstand
The great and overwhelming strength of wrongdoing.

If one wants to counteract our perpetual tendencies to wrongdoing, one needs a strong body and mind. We HAVE a Life of Freedom and Fortune and we want to create the causes so we can have it again, so that it will not be rare for us to find it.

How rare is it to sincerely engage with the practice of spiritual teachings? The virtuous side is so lacking in strength. We only occasionally think of it, and only for a short time. And what we are trying to get rid of is very strong and overwhelming. This is a problem. If virtue is so short and weak and evil is so strong and abundant, isn’t it unbearable to know that the maturation of wrongdoing can come up in a very brief period of time? Is this not terrifying? Is this not true? For most of us? We are in a critical situation. The negative is powerful, lasts longer, and is more frequent than the virtue trying to counteract it and the required virtue is pretty powerless. Th only thing that can really ofercome it is the desire to develop the spirit of enlightenment for the benefit of others. So doesn’t this make a good case to try and develop bodhicitta?

Bodhicitta can cleanse us even of very grave actions such as matricide, patricide, drawing blood from a Buddha with intent to harm, and creating or encouraging divisiveness within a spiritual community. Imagine the conflagration at the end of time that nothing can resist. Bodhicitta consumes all negativities in this way.

Ashragosha, a poet who wrote stories of the Buddha’s past lives, said that if we had affection for all living beings like we have affection for those closets to us, we will never do anything that will harm others. We can achieve this. It requires training and work, as it typically does not come naturally. If we want to work of positive acts to counteract the negative, we need a good rebirth, and the wish and belief that this is worth doing. This is, at first, a brief and occasional thought. Is it easy to get in a situation where you have Freedom and Fortune? And do we have a tendency to do negative things and do them for a long time? Do we want to get rid of negativities? If the answer is yes, you are developing the spirit of enlightenment. This wish can be aspiring, a strong wish to become enlightened, or engaged, to actually do it!

The benefit of this path is the power to wipe out all terrible wrongdoings. This is a big bonus. AND it brings sublime happiness. There are two kinds of bodhicitta: the conventional bodhicitta which is a strong drive to enlightenment in order to help others and ultimate bodhicitta, which is the understanding and direct perception of reality that understands it and can uproot the cause of suffering.

Verse 7 is the Wish Fulfilling Jewel and that this path is best for us and best for others.

The mighty buddhas, pondering for many ages,
Have seen that this, and only this, will save
The boundless multitudes,
And bring them easily to supreme joy.

These are good words, so take an interest! If, for eons of time, all the buddhas, with their marvelous power of intelligence were to investigate and confirm, they would conclude that the very best thing is the development of bodhicitta. Bodhicitta is a totally altruistic concern, it is the seed to all happiness, temporary, intermediate, and ultimate for all the limitless human beings. It is the highest from of kindheartedness. “This is the best, so why not do it?” One doesn’t need to starve the body, have matted hair, not bathe, expose the body to the elements, or practice austerities. The development of bodhicitta can attain the supreme and complete enlightenment easily, and will guarantee good rebirths. So do not be discouraged. With it, you will achieve kindheartedness. You will not harm others and will therefore not have to endure the consequence of that harm by experience the resultant suffering. You will have a clear path. Do you think that is true? The Supreme Altruism, if developed, will, first, get rid of all negativities and, second, give you the seed to all happiness and we have the body and the mind to do it. Do you think so? You do not need to be an exalted being. Ordinary people can develop it and then they get the Big Name: bodhisattva. And then they become the child of the Victorious Ones and you become someone, no matter how humble you were, you become worthy of offerings because you have a precious way of thinking. Do you want to be like that?
Verse 8 Developing bodhicitta is freedom from suffering, so once started, do not turn back.

Those who wish to overcome the sorrows of their lives,
And put to flight the pain and sufferings of beings,
Those who wish to win such great beatitude,
Should never turn their back on bodhicitta.

Any state in the samsara (cyclic existences) is undesirable. One will go around and around through birth, illness, old age, death, whether one is a hell being, a hungry ghost, a human, or an animal. If you fully appreciate the nature of suffering and want to be free from it, developing bodhicitta is the key. Initially, it is the understanding that one wants to maintain one’s higher status (a life of freedom and fortune). If you do not develop bodhicitta, you will have happiness, but it will be intermittent, a side effect. With bodhicitta, we and all others have permanent happiness. SO, make a big effort to develop bodhicitta and never let it to – hang onto it as tightly as you can.

So, is developing bodhicitta essential for our happiness? NO! Gaining personal liberation will free ourselves and we will be happy. But if we develop bodhicitta, that liberation will be faster. Do you understand the benefits? Do you think it’s good to develop bodhicitta? Developing bodhicitta is not for others. It is for us. Are you interested in becoming authentic spiritual practioners?

Friday, May 1, 2009

Linda: Alchemical Lecture Thursday PM, April 30

Alchemical Lecture
Thursday PM, April 30

The first part of this lecture was a continuation of the visualization of purification, in which one visualizes that one is being cleansed of all imperfections.

From the point of union of the deities’ blissful play
Flows nectar-clouds of bodhichitta,
Flowing like fine particles of camphor.
Of myself and all beings through the three realms
Our karma and delusion, the causes of suffering,
Illness, harmful spirits, negativities, obscurations, and transgressions
I implore you to purify them utterly.

The nectar, flowing from the union of the deities (feminine aspect is wisdom, masculine aspect is method) flows down upon the crown (purification of the body), through the throat (purification of speech), through the heart (purification of the mind in the heart), through the naval and then spreading to all parts of the body like the branches and leaves of a tree.

One visualizes our negativities leaving through the lower openings of the body: the pores, excrement, urine, and soles of the feet. First, one visualizes that all illnesses in the form of rotten blood and pus leave from these openings. Then, one visualizes that all harmful spirits that wish to harm the body are seen as animals such as a fish, turtle, snake ?,?, lice, or lice eggs leave the body by the same means. Then one visualizes the negativities and obscurations accumulated through our body, mind, and speech as liquid residues, black residues, or black liquid as leaving the body. Finally, one visualizes that one’s transgressions to the 3 vows (ordained, bodhisattva, secret) in the form of dark and murky clouds or as purple smoke as leaving the body through the pores of lower openings. One recites the 100 Syllable Mantra will making this visualization of purification.

Next, one visualizes one’s being as being completely filled with the pure nectar of heavenly bliss, that you are perfectly clear and pervaded with this essence. Also, the negativities have to go somewhere. One visualizes them as going under ground through a crack in the earth. There, the Lord of Death, Yama, surrounded by many beings await your karmic debts. The negativities one does has to be paid for. It is true, metaphysically, that Yama and these beings are illusions, but they can still lead one to the lower realms and create obstacles. So in visualizing this aspect, one is visualizing that you are giving them whatever they want. And you visualize the negativities as going into the mouth and waiting arms of Yama where they will be transformed into whatever these beings want. Thus, they are satisfied, your karmic debts are paid, the beings are happy and content and will disappear into the earth and the earth closes. Now, you are a pure, clear body and filled with white colored nectar, and there are no karmic negativities or obscurations. Again, one visualizes this while reciting the 100 syllable mantra.

The next part of this lecture was intensely (even more intensely) alchemical. Due to the detailed and exact nature of the symbolism and the fact that this is my first introduction to this symbolism, I think it is best to not put it into writing. For those interested in the details of this part of the alchemical teachings, which is the first touch into tantric practice, I will be happy to share my notes, such as they are, with the caveats in place of my limited experience and understanding. This teaching discusses the 5 chakras, and one has visualizations at each level that will lead to various empowerments, relief of obscurations, and plants the seeds of future Buddha bodies. This practice is immensely powerful and detailed, and requires many years of study under the supervision of a true spiritual teacher and leads to a profound understanding, particularly of the subtle mind, and is referred to as the Primordial Wisdom.

These teachings have been extremely secret, though in this day of modern technology, some of these teachings have been made available. This lecture touched on some of these teachings, as much as could be discussed in a common lecture. The present lamas felt that many misunderstandings were occurring because of the availability of some of the teachings in museums and libraries. They felt that it was more dangerous to give no teachings than to give just a little explanation, and that to pretend that there were no secret teachings and only the law was more dangerous than admitting that there are secret teachings. They consider this introduction an antidote to wrong views, and the hope that one would not practice any spiritual teachings, especially those of such a sublime nature without the guidance of a true spiritual master.

Linda: Motivational Lecture: Thursday AM, April 30

Motivational Lecture: Thursday AM, April 30

Yesterday’s exposition was on Verse 4, Line 1: “So hard to find such ease and wealth”, and refers to the fact that we have been born with the 8 Freedoms and 10 Good Fortunes. We do have the means and the ability to accomplish what we wish to accomplish for either our temporary well-being or our ultimate well-being. This thought should fill you with immense joy!!

“Whereby to render meaningful this human birth!” To render meaningful this human birth means to practice the means that will first of all create a positive rebirth. A positive rebirth is one in which you are born with an excellent body and an excellent mind, having the prosperity to practice a spiritual means, and having good companions to support and help you. SO, we have a good body and a good mind. We have the means to pursue ethical discipline, and it is precisely ethical discipline that will guarantee a positive rebirth. Practicing the virtue of generosity leads to a rebirth with an excellent body. Practicing patience will lead to a rebirth with the prosperity and companions needed. Practicing enthusiastic effort will enable us to do what we set out to do. Practicing concentration will assure us that we will not be overwhelmed by the negative virtues. And finally, practicing good understanding will give us the knowledge required. We do not want to be stupid! These ethical disciplines are something we can do now! They are the groundwork for any kind of vow we may, in future, wish to take. In Buddhism, the 4 kinds of vows are the lay persons vow, the ordained persons vow, the bodhisattva vow, and the tantric vow. Which vow one takes is determined by their interest and enthusiasm. After taking a vow, then one wants to safeguard that vow by refraining from transgressions.

We are born of the womb, and are thus endowed with the 6 Faculties. Our karma is one that is subtle and very powerful. It can bear fruit in this life, and that fruit can be positive or negative!!!!!! Think of all the higher beings we know (the sages and revealers). Their body and mind are no different from ours! Their access to the scriptures is no different than ours. There is no difference. Everything depends on interest and enthusiasm. You can do this and you can do it in the fullest possible way! When you read this verse, you should read it as if it is addressed to you personally.

Take a good look at yourself. You need the virtues, and the virtues must be excellent. Look at yourself. How good are your chances for a positive rebirth? If you do not cultivate the chance to create really excellent virtues you will be born in a state where you are not free. You will not get a good rebirth, never mind the possibility of liberation and enlightenment. So you really want to do what is of benefit to yourself and to others.

The following line of this verse should also fill you with the fear of wasting such a possibility. “If now I fail to turn it to my profit, How could such a chance be mine again?” If one does not do something of true benefit for one’s self and for others, in both the short term and the long term, to create the good virtues that will result in a good rebirth, if you are wasting this time, it will be very, very hard to get this chance again.

The next 10 chapters describe the benefit of wanting to pursue this path, on not letting that desire lessen, of making that desire stronger, and of dedicating that merit to all sentient beings. If you take this path 100%, all will be well with us, no matter what age you are. It is true that it is best to start it when you are young. If you are middle aged, it’s OK. If you are old, well, it’s a bit late but you can still do something!

Does this make you think??????? To practice you need a special kind of body and a special kind of mind.

Side conversation: According to Buddhist cosmological symbolism, there is a mountain in the center of the universe, Mount Meru. Surrounding that mountain are 4 continents, north, south, east, west. (There was some debate as to whether these continents were of this world or of a greater cosmology.) We are located in the southern continent, which is the best place to be to develop bodhicitta (the spirit of enlightenment). The conversation between the teacher and translator went to how difficult it was for westerners to belief this. The teacher emphatically said, “You don’t believe what you don’t see! Do you see your mind?” He went on to say that, if you develop the path of insight in this life, and even if you are reborn in the god realm of desire where it is difficult to want to pursue bodhichitta, you would still be able to continue to develop the path of seeing, even then. Otherwise, it is difficult to achieve an exalted state in the god realms. Conclusion: the human realm is best! It is true that bodhicitta can be developed the first time in animals, hungry ghosts, or gods, but it is not the best working basis. The human state is best, and many scriptures support this.

Verse 4 is a very important verse, for it establishes the physical basis for pursuing the spirit of enlightenment. (We have the mind and the body, and this is the best state possible for pursuing it, and if we don’t, the chances of getting another opportunity are far removed.)

Verse 5 begins to describe the Mental Basis for developing bodhicitta

As when a flash of lightening rends the night,
And in its glare shows all that the dark black clouds had hid,
Likewise rarely, through the buiddhas’ power,
Virtuous thoughts rise, brief and transient in the world.

First, one must have the faith and belief in the teachings in general. Then, one must have the aspiration to practice it. Is this easy?? Be honest! Do we easily want to be virtuous (without self interest) and are we really enthusiastic for a spiritual practice, to have a willingness to put aside our own personal interest and dedicate ourselves completely to protect others from suffering? Once you have found this willingness, then you must strengthen it, then make it grow. (Again, this is the background of the entire book.)

Virtuous thoughts and moments of excellent virtue are like flashes of lightening in a night with no moon and where the stars are covered by thick rain clouds. There are moments of virtue, but they are sporadic and brief. Occasionally, thoughts will arise that come as a blessing and protection from the Buddha.

It is like we are in a dungeon of cyclic existence where even the light of the exalted beings is absent. Even a glimmer of hearing the teachings is rare. All is shrouded in the darkness of wrongdoing and suffering. Who is in that dungeon? Us ordinary beings. But, there are a few who have imprints in their soul from before. They are open to the Buddha’s blessings and occasionally have the thought, just the thought, to want to do something of benefit. This thought will lead to happiness, but it will be rare and brief. Is this not true? Isn’t it mostly true?

Everyone has the Buddha nature! We have that nature and disposition, but it is not active. The imprint is there, so we would like to do something. It is difficult because we are not familiar with the thoughts and ideas associated with the teachings. We are very familiar with harmful things and disturbing emotions.

What is necessary is an interest and a belief in the teachings.
Second, to have an openness to the blessing of Enlightenment.
Third, if we are open to receive the teachings, that we then develop the wish to
attain bodhisattva.
Fourth, that if we make the effort to develop the spirit of enlightenment, that we make
that spirit grow.

Is this not good advice?

Once you have a belief and interest, you are creating merit that accords with the virtue compatible with the initial level of capacity. This will then lead to the basis for creating the virtue that accords with the practice of the intermediate level of personal liberation. This will in turn lead to the virtue of the Mahayana, which is the Great Capacity, which is to do it for others. A strong interest and belief is fundamental.

There are 3 kinds of faith. 1. The clarifying faith of appreciation. 2. The clarifying faith of conviction. 3. The clarifying faith of aspiration. We can have the clarifying faith of appreciation from contact with the 3 Jewels (Buddha/teacher, Dharma/law or method, Sangha/spiritual companionship). Learning this will give the faith of conviction. Conviction will lead to aspiration. And once one does this, one’s faith becomes a firm and unshakeable belief.

The mind. This mind or mental basis is the main cause of the spirit of enlightenment. (Develop the mind through the teacher/method/virtue with the help of spiritual companions.) The body is the cooperative cause, and is very hard to come by.

Compassion is the root of the spirit of enlightenment.

And in this verse, Shantideva is telling us something big.